Being a mom has turned me into this crazy person. I read so many baby blogs and books and I find that I spend a lot of my time comparing babies and worrying that mine isn't where she should be. It is starting to drive my husband nuts! I'm always comparing Elizabeth with other babies around her age. I know that every child is different but I just want to make sure that she is developing the way she should be so I worry.
I worry that she sleeps too much. Some days she sleeps most of the day (like only awake maybe 5 hours of the day). I read that they should be sleeping about 15-16 hours a day and Liz is sleeping more like 18-20 hours most days. I worry because she hardly ever smiles. I can make funny faces and tickle her but she hardly ever smiles at me. She smiles in her sleep but she rarely smiles while looking at you. She also hasn't started trying to grab things yet. I've put her on her activity mat and get her to try to grab her toys hanging down but she wont. She puts her hands in her mouth when she's hungry but that's really all she does with them. I've put her in the mirror so she can see herself and she never looks straight in the mirror. She always looks side to side.
Every time I hear about a baby doing something on a blog I insistently compare Elizabeth to them. Then I go and tell my husband well Liz isn't doing this but this person's baby is and they are the same age. It is seriously driving us both nuts! I'm just ready for my little girl to start doing things and being awake more so I can play with her.
How do you deal with the comparing and worrying?
BeThankful....
12 years ago
I find myself comparing Wyatt to other babies sometimes too - but there really is nothing to worry about! Every baby develops at a different rate, and just because they might learn a certain skill later does not mean a thing. Plus, I've come to the conclusion that these "milestones" are really subjective - someone may say their baby first smiled or laughed or grabbed a toy at a certain age, but they might interpret what actions actually "count" as a first differently than I do. For instance, Wyatt would make these little smiley-type faces when he was pretty young, but I didn't count it as his "real" smile until I knew for sure that he meant it. Other people might not interpret that the same way. The only time you have a reason to worry is if the pediatrician is worried, but I have a feeling that Elizabeth is probably right where she should be! Don't worry!
ReplyDeleteP.S. Wyatt didn't intentionally grab and hold things until he was close to four months - and now he grabs everything! He also didn't smile until he was close to two months, and then it was still somewhat rare for a while. And babies do sleep alot when they're that young, especially if they're going through a growth spurt! Elizabeth sounds perfectly normal to me!
ReplyDeleteYeah, that is really tough! I say, go by your gut instinct! If your baby seems "happy" (even if she's not smiling,) and she's growing well (even if she's teeny tiny!) she's fine! Enjoy each stage as it comes and don't try to push her into the next stage because then the previous one will be over!
ReplyDeleteI struggle with this, too, and unfortunately don't have an answer! I know several new mommas who have babies around the same age, and whenever I read that their little one is doing something, I start to wonder why Joe hasn't done it or hasn't done it as much. In the end, I have to remind myself that every baby is different. That doesn't always help when I'm really wanting Joe to smile at me or start cooing, but it makes things a little easier :-)
ReplyDeleteWell, I don't have kids but I'd say as long as the doc isn't concerned then everything is fine and she's developing nicely. I know it must be hard to not worry when you're now suddenly responsible for another life though!
ReplyDeleteI don't have kids yet either, but that has to be so hard not to do! I think I would too! :)
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